Black Love Language: A Four Part Valentine’s Day Series— Part 2

Figuring out the rhythms of a black hearts song. There are five different love languages; five different ways in which we let a person know we love them: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Physical Touch, Acts of Service & Gifts. As a connoisseur of black love movies, I’ve decided to examine the relationship dynamics of my favorite cinematic, black love stories. If you recognize them, hello, my fellow romantic. If not, get to know them. Delving into a topic I’ve studied and adored for the longest is my pleasure. Happy Black Valentine’s Day.

A Blues for Nina...

Meet Darius and Nina:

Two artists. Chicago natives. An aspiring writer and an intriguing photographer. A man who has a way with his words and a woman who likes what she sees. Two very transparent, passionate and raw lovers.

WORDS OF AFFIRMATION.

A writer never runs out of things to say or ways to say them. I know. I’m a writer. It’s an art form. Ironically, not all writers are the best communicators, but we find the best ways to say what we need to say.

The first time Nina and Darius met was at an open mic at a night club. Darius got on stage and recited a poem that he dedicated to Nina only moments after learning her name: A Blues for Nina.

Y’all.

Listen to this sh*t.

If you wanna get my attention, nigga, THAT’S how you get my attention. Period.

He made her feel not only desired, but wanted. His approach was creative and thoughtful. He found a way to say everything he had to say in less than two minutes: you’re beautiful, you’re powerful and I wanna f*ck...

AND HE DID! on the night of their first date.

And you know what he said the morning after?

Look, uh, I really dig you Nina and I ... hope we didn’t move too fast.

What a better time to affirm a woman than after she just gave you some?

GIFTS.

Now, these two didn’t exchange too many gifts between one another. I mean... they didn’t give each other gifts at all. Not every romance is fluent in every love language, which is perfectly fine. In this case, gift giving wasn’t their thing...

ACTS OF SERVICE.

Ok. So, boom.

The morning after Darius and Nina make love for the first time, he makes her breakfast... a cheese omelette & freshly squeezed orange juice. This nigga woke up and started squeezing oranges.

And if that’s not enough, the night he saw her and his homeboy out together he still made sure she got home safely despite the fact that she was f*ckin with his boy after they’d parted ways.

D:You and I both know you don’t want to be out here this late stomping up and down like somebody done stole your fucking bike. Now all I wanna do is try to make sure you get home safely, trust me.

He called her a cab, waited with her and everything. He definitely didn’t have to do that. But he loved her. Love has no limiting conditions.

QUALITY TIME.

THIS was definitely their primary love language. They went to the bookstore together, went to parties together, he’d be with her while she was developing photos, she’d sit on the couch and keep him company while he’d write, they went out with his friends all the time... they genuinely enjoyed each other’s company.

PHYSICAL TOUCH.

Ok, this was definitely their secondary love language. In the beginning of their situationship, all they did was have sex! Every time they were in each other’s presence they were on each other’s bodies.

(Did I mention Nina’s friend, Josie? LMAO.)

Aside from love making on the regular, the two of them danced. Do you know how intimate a slow dance is? How close the two of you have to be just to catch not only the rhythm of the music, but of each other? You learn how important the positioning of ones hands are. How ones heartbeat reacts to sudden movements and sounds. You learn which crevices of the other persons body will allow you to fit in and sit in them comfortably. How do they smell, how heavy the weight of their bodies are. How in sync are the two of you?

Whew... chile.

One minute Darius and Nina were together, one minute they were “just kickin it” & another minute they were complete strangers. However it went, they were inseparable.

After a year of no communication and having excelled in both of their careers, the two found their way back to one another at the same spot they met at. Only this time, Nina was the one reciting the poetry...

It is the color of light The shape of sound high in the evergreens It lies suspended in hills A blue line in a red sky

I am looking at sound

I’m hearing the brightness of high bluffs and almond trees I’m tasting the wilderness of lakes, rivers and streams Caught in an angle of song

I’m remembering water that glows in the dawn The motion tumbled in earth Life hidden in mounds

I am dancing a bright beam of light I am remembering love

---

Happy Black Valentine’s Day.

Celebrate you and your Love Jones

Romance is about the possibility of things.  You see it’s about the time between when you first meet some fine woman and when you first make love to her.  And when you first ask a woman to marry you and when she says I do.  When people that have been together for a long time say the romance is gone, what they’re really saying is that they’ve exhausted the possibility.

Favor, Peace & Blessings,

Mimi.